Pimp My Kitchen: Magic Bullet

by Rachel on May 30, 2009

As I’ve said before, I’m a sucker for infomercials. After hearing about an amazing product for 30 minutes, I’m usually convinced. My budget is really all that keeps me from trying every product out there. Slim in 6? Don’t mind if I do! The Ab Rocker? How long does it take to get here?? The entire Winsor Pilates system? I’m getting turned on.

The best infomercial of all time is, without question, the Magic Bullet. It’s an hour of pure delight, as two hosts show all their out-of-town guests the amazing things they can make with this insanely cool machine. Smoothies! Salsa! This isn’t your typical infomercial…it’s more like a soap opera with a little bit of Rachael Ray thrown in. It never gets old to me.

Finally, after years of wanting one, I finally got one. (Well I actually got an impostor first and it broke—so get the real thing.) It has been the greatest addition to my kitchen since, well, ever.

I was never a smoothie girl because I hate Jamba Juice and I hate blenders (too big and bulky!), but now I love a homemade smoothie. When it comes to homemade smoothies, anything goes. Into the Magic Bullet goes anything from protein powder to silken tofu to soymilk or yogurt, with mixed fruits and even nuts or flax seeds. Literally 10 seconds in the Magic Bullet, and breakfast is ready.

For a while I just stuck to smoothies. Then I made a blended soup one day, and that was a big step. But as time went on, I stopped avoiding recipes that begin “put the first six ingredients into a good processor.” Those recipes always scared me. Our food processor at home had a blade like something from “Saw II” and was a huge pain in the ass to clean. I was terrified of it, to be honest. I couldn’t imagine using it to whip up a healthy pesto. God. No. Never.

The first time I used my Magic Bullet for something other than a smoothie was to chop sun-dried tomatoes. Sun-dried tomatoes are a really yummy addition to plain pastas, but they are a huge hassle to cut, because they have the texture of a raisin. A knife just drags through them and gets stuck. I finally tossed them in the Magic Bullet and used the second blade (I am sure it has an official name, but I use it for anything that is a non liquid or requires mincing or chopping). “It’s like magic!” I screamed. Oh, right…the name…

Now I’m a woman hooked. I used it on several recipes from my Hungry Girl cookbook. Most recently, I used it to make salsa. I made homemade salsa, and when it was done, I realized it was super chunky and I should have chopped everything more finely. “I wish there was some way to chop it even though it’s already mixed up.” The Magic Bullet twinkled at me. Suddenly I had smoother salsa.

If you’re still getting the hang of the whole cooking thing, this is an indispensable tool. It’s small and easy to clean and can handle so many tasks.

I wish they’d release a new infomercial (although the old is a classic) so I could star in it. I’m thinking of starting a YouTube series where I make something new in it every single week. I could call it “Rachel’s Magic Bullet” and see how many porn-seekers come away with a desire for a beautifully pureed broccoli soup.

{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

1 Kali May 5, 2011 at 5:31 pm

…I need one of those.


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