Wet Wednesday

by Rachel on August 31, 2011

It’s Wednesday already? This week is going pretty fast! Here’s what’s blowing my skirt up today.

Hot

1. The Hunger Games. Leah kept urging me to read this book and I finally started the first one on my flight back from the Ozarks. I stayed up past my bedtime to read most of it that night and finished it the next night because I was so into it. I started the second book the next day and read it all in one day because I just couldn’t put it down. I was getting a little tired from staying up so late reading, so I waited to start the third one until Friday evening when I could read as late as I wanted. It’s just absolutely addicting. It’s a YA novel but it reminds me a lot of The Giver, which is one of the best YA novels ever. I’m pretty obsessed and excited for the movie next year!

2. Eric cooking me dinner. I realized that my life would be so much better if I didn’t have to cook every night. Well…ask and ye shall receive right? Eric made buffalo chicken burgers (using a recipe I annotated in detail, as he’s not the most experienced cook) and they were so good.

I’m not just saying that so he keeps doing it…the meal really was delicious! This needs to happen a lot more often.

3. The Target music teacher commercial. I used to see this commercial every day during the Today Show and thought it was so funny and knew Eric would get a kick out of it too. When he finally saw it, he  too was hooked. Now saying “denim”…or really anything…like the music teacher sings it has become our new favorite joke.

Bothered

1. The VMAs. I was very confused on Sunday night when my Facebook and Twitter feeds turned into a VMA fest. Like….why would a bunch of grown-ass men and women be watching the VMAs? Do you even know who half those people are? I don’t!

When you’re too old to be on “The Real World,” you’re too old to care about the VMAs. I’m judging.

2. This Cuisinart food processor. Holy shit, this food processor. My mom bought it for me and I’ve put off using it for two months because it seemed so complicated. And it is complicated. It comes with a DVD to show you how to use it. That really shouldn’t be necessary. I tried to use it to grate cheese last night and fought with all the blades and attachments; my oven was heating, my pasta was boiling, and my temperature was rising. I never ended up getting the damn thing to work. Am I just completely inept here? I plan to watch the DVD this weekend and find out.

3.“Baby Roulette.” I read this article in the October issue of Glamour last night and found myself getting really worked up about it. Basically, it says that a disturbing number of young women — particularly those in long-term relationships — are getting very lax about their birth control because they don’t mind if pregnancy “just happens.” It seems that women aren’t sure when and how they want to become parents, so they aren’t deciding. Rather than face the fear of career/motherhood balance and potential infertility if they wait too long, they’re taking an “accidentally on purpose” approach. They also don’t think birth control is effective and think, Oh I might be infertile anyway, due to things like irregular periods or fibroids and the fact that it seems like everyone is getting pregnant via fertility drugs these days.  The women in serious relationships tend to think that their partner will be there for them if they get pregnant (statistics say otherwise) and one woman said, “If you start a little earlier, that’s not a problem — maybe it will even accelerate the wedding bells.”

84fahsgasdhgasjhdg87253891asfghs@#%@^%%(*^@#^a254vadfasfdfasfdsfgsdfafgd!!!!!!!!!!

I was so pissed I was reading this article (and now I’m getting pissed as I re-read it). Birth control is a privilege. The right to choose when to have kids is a privilege. Not making decisions about your life because you’re unsure or too scared — and seeing getting pregnant as “easier” because it makes the decision for you — is just crazy to me. And unfair to your partner!

It’s OK to not be sure what you want. It’s OK to let things happen and see where life takes you. It’s OK to be a single mom. But I think we can do better than being “more faithful to our diets than our birth control.”

Definitely read the full article; it goes into way more detail on the topic and the consequences. And I’d love to hear your thoughts on this topic!

What’s on your list today?

{ 54 comments… read them below or add one }

1 [SMASH] at Sweat. Style. Swoon. August 31, 2011 at 10:13 am

Weird question… Does ground chicken [when cooked] just taste like regular chicken [texture-wise]? I’ve never tried it but it seems like a much healthier alternative. Also, I’ve never tried ground turkey either. :o/ Help!

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2 Dori August 31, 2011 at 10:18 am

Perfect timing — I was up until 3 am finishing The Hunger Games last night. Then, at 3:01 am, I opened my computer, went to Amazon and placed an order for the next two books to arrive on Friday (so thankful for Prime!). I cannot wait. CAN’T WAIT. Squirming in my seat.

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3 Rachel August 31, 2011 at 10:20 am

Yesss!! So good, right?!

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4 Dori August 31, 2011 at 10:28 am

Yes. I am regretting not springing for the overnight shipping.

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5 Dori August 31, 2011 at 12:43 pm

Update: I could not wait and I went to Target on my lunch break. They only had books 1 and 3. Useless to me!

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6 Manon August 31, 2011 at 10:26 am

OMFG…….the VMAs (and the people who watch them) make me angry on so many levels. First of all, MTV HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH MUSIC, NOR DO THEY PLAY VIDEOS, SO WHY DO THEY HAVE VIDEO MUSIC AWARDS? Yet, somehow everyone gets their panties all wet when they roll around…I just don’t get it…….and I don’t want to. As far as the birth control issue….it’s disgusting and SCARY that people sure as hell have an opinion about what Beyonce or Lady Gaga wears to the VMAs, but they can’t have their own thoughts about when, how, or WHO WITH to have babies? I’m going to have a heart attack just thinking about how ridiculous and SCARY this is.

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7 Rachel August 31, 2011 at 10:32 am

“It’s disgusting and SCARY that people sure as hell have an opinion about what Beyonce or Lady Gaga wears to the VMAs, but they can’t have their own thoughts about when, how, or WHO WITH to have babies?”

AMEN TO THAT! And not that MTV is helping, with the “Teen Mom” girls getting like $20K per episode and ending up on the cover of US Weekly.

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8 Summer August 31, 2011 at 10:27 am

I can’t stand women with that attitude towards pregnancy. I used to have a friend who slept around A LOT and was not on birth control and rarely used condoms. I asked her all the time what would happen if she got pregnant and she admitted she was fine with the idea because she wanted kids anyway. She even once said that she was kind of WORRIED that she hadn’t gotten pregnant because she was scared it might mean she had fertility problems!

I find this mentality completely unacceptable.

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9 Rachel August 31, 2011 at 10:35 am

I think a LOT of women feel this way, honestly. I feel like fear of infertility is one of the main contributors to this mindset!

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10 Eunice August 31, 2011 at 10:33 am

Hmmmm…interesting view on the pregnancy article. I’m going to read it before forming an opinion, but I feel like I could identify both with what you said and what these women are thinking. Looking for the article now!

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11 Emily August 31, 2011 at 10:36 am

i’ve had a good number of friends who got pregnant because they got “lazy” with their birth control–the somewhat good news is that most of them were married (ovbi went to christian schools)–the really bad news is that their husbands started resenting them (especially when they were about to ship out army style for the next four years and essentially miss the first four years of their child’s life, seen it happen twice in 3 years). I’ve always been a pretty implusive person but i make an effort to keep my impluses in check when it could effect the life of another person (ie my bf) and especially when it comes to STARTING the life of another person, i feel like it is incredibly selfish to do anything less. It makes sense that this is what is happening though, just go to a community pool you’ll probably see dozens of women who still arent sure if they want that baby teetering on the edge of the baby pool…

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12 Liz @ Southern Charm August 31, 2011 at 10:38 am

Today I have a pretty long list since I’m going out of town Friday. My dog needs to get dropped off at my parents, Rx need to be picked up, outfits need to be picked out and I need to download some books on my nook for my flight!

I just finished the Hunger Games too so am moving on to the next one! So excited.

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13 Rachel August 31, 2011 at 10:46 am

Oh fun! Where are you going??

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14 Brandy @ Let's Grab a Coffee August 31, 2011 at 10:53 am

Usually I read your posts and think: we are exactly on the same page about every single thing.

Until today. I totally watched, and enjoyed, the VMA’s even though I knew almost nobody on them. I had even more fun watching the comments come through on twitter.

I do, however, share your feelings towards the article on pregnancy. How sad and frustrating!

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15 Paul McConaughy (@minutrition) August 31, 2011 at 10:59 am

Well you had comments on just about everything except your favorite commercial…so here goes. I wonder what it says about us that my favorite Target commercial is “Lewis and Clarke”. My wife and I crack up when she says “frraaactions” and then when she stops the hamster dead in his tracks in the habitrail with a sharp “Clarke”.

Great job by Target. Just look, people are talking about them!

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16 Rachel August 31, 2011 at 11:04 am

Seriously! Target is on fire right now!

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17 Diane August 31, 2011 at 11:07 am

“When you’re too old to be on “The Real World,” you’re too old to care about the VMAs.”

ACCURATE.

But I will probably always watch “True Life.” I mean, where else am I going to learn so much about Southern Belles, the Jersey Shore, and people who carry ranch dressing in their purse?

I just really love “True Life.”

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18 Rachel August 31, 2011 at 11:11 am

Yeahhh those were classics. But is “True Life” even on anymore?!

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19 Diane August 31, 2011 at 11:33 am

Yes it is! I just watched “True Life: I have a sugar daddy” a few weeks ago at mtv.com.

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20 Alexia (Dimple Snatcher) August 31, 2011 at 11:09 am

What confused me about the VMA (of course I don’t watch!!) was that folks were SO emotional (literally in tears) that Beyonce is preggers. Hilarious.

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21 Danielle August 31, 2011 at 11:32 am

So you’re too much of an adult to watch the VMAs, and judge people who do watch, but it’s acceptable to read young adult science fiction novels and bake a pink cake for your birthday?!

Come on! And while I agree with your thoughts on the pregnancy thing, I do think that you shouldn’t really bash people for their choices. You always promote doing your own thing and not apologizing for it, but you put down women for their choices!

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22 Rachel August 31, 2011 at 11:40 am

Haha I wondered if anyone would see the novels and the VMAs as similar!

You’re right, I do not promote bashing people for their choices, but a non-choice that has a huge effect on so many others and is made out of fear of really making a choice feels very different to me. I don’t know how else to really explain it. I’m frustrated that women feel like they have to do it this way because they can’t just do their thing and own it.

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23 Rachel August 31, 2011 at 11:43 am

Also, I thought we were cool about the pink cake thing.

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24 Danielle August 31, 2011 at 12:01 pm

LOL, we are! I’m just being a pain in the ass. I know you always have a thoughtful way of “defending” (hate that expression for it, but you know what I mean) your posts/comments, so I feel like I can be the devil’s advocate because I end up learning more about where you’re coming from!

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25 Rachel August 31, 2011 at 12:10 pm

Fair enough! Maybe because I don’t “know” you, or know your tone I guess, it’s hard for me to know if you’re just wanting to go deeper or really pissed and calling bullshit. I don’t ever mind explaining/discussing more though!

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26 Arianna August 31, 2011 at 11:55 am

You always seem to have something negative or critical to say, either to Rachel or about other people/bloggers. I totally get the urge to nitpick bloggers — after all, they do put it all out there for public consumption — but usually I stop reading a blog if I feel the need to critique everything they write, do, or believe. What’s the point?

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27 Danielle August 31, 2011 at 12:07 pm

Nope, not negative things to say, just my reaction to posts/comments that make me think, or question something.

I don’t think it’s wrong to “always” (not exactly true, anyway) have something to “nitpick”, as you say. It makes ME question the things that I say and where it’s coming from. And then I think, “Have I done this recently? Is this thing bothering me bc it’s bringing up my own sh*t? Am I the one that really feels hypocritical here?”

I also just totally DON’T believe the answer is to stop reading. I read a lot of blogs for a lot of different reasons, and if I only read things I 100% agreed with and believed in, I’d be very closed minded. I’m not being nasty to anyone, so I don’t see the big deal. So I make a few smart ass comments? Big deal. I don’t go around my life tuning everything out that bothers me. I try to engage with it, think about it, comment on it, and discuss it w/ people. Like I commented to Rachel above, I find that I learn more about the “why” of her posts when we discuss something in the comments, and that’s what I like about reading blogs. But seriously, you don’t get anywhere in life without asking questions and looking at things with a critical eye sometimes.

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28 Arianna August 31, 2011 at 12:23 pm

True, we all read blogs for different reasons. Sometimes it’s nice to read things that challenge us/conflict with our views. I just know some of your comments have made me feel like you were ONLY reading Rachel’s blog to find things to critique, which is kind of disheartening. Maybe some of it has to do with the way things come across in writing versus in your head? But as long as you and Rachel have an understanding, then I guess it’s all good. I know Rachel’s more than capable of explaining herself!

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29 Michelle August 31, 2011 at 12:18 pm

I loooove the denim target commcerical, but since I work there, I promise it gets annoying after hearing it on loop for 8 hours.

Also, WTF to that article. I guess I’m mostly confused as how these women find getting pregnant “easier.” Since when is raising kids easy?

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30 Jacki August 31, 2011 at 12:37 pm

I love that commercial and will sometimes sing “DENIM!” to my boyfriend at random, usually when drinking wine.

And speaking of the boyfriend, he likes to make little jokes when I take my pill. “Don’t forget that!” etc. Eye rolling aside, I really just don’t get why women would purposely be careless. If you aren’t sure you’re ready to become a parent, it’s not time, IMO, and you should continue making the effort to prevent pregnancy. My boyfriend’s son is a “baby roulette” baby, as is BF’s son’s older half-sister (same mom – BF’s ex-wife). They are amazing kids, but I know it was very difficult for their mom the first time around, and she is now a single parent of two. Parenthood isn’t something I’m ready for, and although I’d GET ready for it if my birth control failed, I am not going to be careless about it!

DENIM!

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31 Rachel August 31, 2011 at 1:11 pm

LOL at that ending. (Love the whole comment too!)

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32 Stina August 31, 2011 at 12:48 pm

I haven’t read the article, but the amount of general ignorance regarding birth control, getting pregnant, and sexual health in general both astounds and infuriates me. I’m all for the “when it happens, it happens” approach assuming it’s an intentional decision (e.g. a friend of mine and her husband decided they were ready for kids but they weren’t in the “omg we need to get pregnant right now” mindset either so they stopped using contraception and just let it happen.); however I totally agree with your points about non-decision.

Unfortunately I think it’s a direct result of a lack of education and our culture as a whole. Women are still expected to have children, but we (as a culture) also expect them to have a carreer and often look fown on those who choose to be stay-at-home moms. I think it can create a lot of pressure and conflicting feelings that are difficult to face. I’m not saying that’s any excuse, but combined with the dismal sex education and general sex-negative attitude in this country, I can definitely see how this “accidentally on purpose” attitude has developed.

From more personal experience, I recently stopped taking my birth control because it was causing me wicked migraines, and I couldn’t imagine taking the approach talked about in the article. My boyfriend and I have been using condoms (pretty diligently) while I try to decide if I want to try a different pill or alternative form of hormonal birth control. We’ve also talked about what would happen if I were to get pregnant. My period was late this month,and I was on the edge of a frickin panic attack despite knowing a) it was pretty damn unlikely I was actually pregnant and b) everything would be okay if I was. I can’t imagine how people who haven’t made the intentional decision to get pregnant would deal with that – particularly if they weren’t 100% sure their partner was on board with the idea.

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33 Rachel August 31, 2011 at 1:10 pm

“I’m not saying that’s any excuse, but combined with the dismal sex education and general sex-negative attitude in this country, I can definitely see how this ‘accidentally on purpose’ attitude has developed.”

AGREE. We aren’t creating a women-positive environment if this feels like the only solution to this dilemma.

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34 Jessica @ Stylish Stealthy and Healthy August 31, 2011 at 2:06 pm

I also have that food processor and it is complicated as shit. I only use the main setting and the rest of the blades, bells and whistles are at the bottom of a box somewhere in my garage, and that’s where they will stay. It also took me like 37 times to figure out how to fasten it onto the dock thing.
Also…the Hunger Games? Amazing. Many late nights were spent reading that series and I can’t freaking wait for the movie.
And lastly… OMG I HATE THAT COMMERCIAL!! That stupid song gets stuck in my head for hours and drives me crazy and it’s in my head just thinking about it!! GAH!
Still love ya though.

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35 rachel August 31, 2011 at 2:09 pm

I actually read this article and put it on a “to write about” list. I have a 23 year old friend who has a now 2 year old son with her on-again off-again boyfriend of about 2 years. Although we’ve always known how much she wants/wanted to be a mom, it was hard to watch her play roulette with her boyfriend of only 2 months-she very much just stopped using birth control on a whim and wound up pregnant after a month of being off of it…her bf didn’t even know a) she was off of it or b) if he even wanted to be a dad. She is a great mom, but her relationship with her baby’s daddy is a constant roller coaster. I know she doesn’t regret being a mom, but I know she regrets not waiting either for a stable relationship or to be stable completely on her own as a single mom before she got pregnant. I think a lot of these women need to remember that it’s not just about HAVING the kids, it’s about RAISING them too. You can bet I’ll be waiting until I know I’m able to be the best mom I can be.

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36 Kim August 31, 2011 at 2:25 pm

Am I the only one who’s upset that The Giver has a sequel?

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37 Liz August 31, 2011 at 2:53 pm

I lovedddddddddd The Giver. The sequel? I gave up after the first couple chapters. I was really let down.

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38 Rachel August 31, 2011 at 2:58 pm

Ew, it does? I hadn’t heard that…and def don’t have a desire to read it!

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39 Jennifer August 31, 2011 at 2:26 pm

1. Love Hunger Games SO MUCH!! 2. Love that commercial. 3. That article is very upsetting! Becoming a parent is such an important step in your life that you really need to know if it’s a responsibility you want to take on or not. “Forgetting” to take your birth control is not only irresponsible, but really, really disrespectful to your partner. Sure, accidents do happen, but to not consciously make the decision to become a parent is crazy. Maybe these women just don’t realize what it takes to be a parent. It’s a lot of hard work and sleepless nights and finances that you need to commit. Anyway, I just don’t think women should take the privilege of birth control for granted this way.

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40 Liz August 31, 2011 at 2:52 pm

HOT: The HUNGER GAMES t-shirt I am rocking today. AND I’M 30 YEARS OLD. IDGAF.

HOT: “Under the Dome” by Stephen King audiobook.

Bothered: Stressful work!

Bothered: CRAMPS.

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41 Liz August 31, 2011 at 2:52 pm

Ooops, sorry that I replied to your post, Jennifer. I internet gud.

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42 Liz August 31, 2011 at 2:53 pm

All you Hunger Games fans need to read “Battle Royale”. It’s really good.

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43 Bianca @ Confessions of a Chocoholic August 31, 2011 at 5:19 pm

I LOVE the Hunger Games and cannot wait for the movie! Did you check out the casting? I am psyched for who is playing Cinna…

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44 Ariel August 31, 2011 at 5:32 pm

I love music videos and I love music award shows, including the VMAs. I’m owning it. I love ridiculous over-the-top musical spectacles! Last night I watched the VMAs (yup, I tivo-ed them) and then went on an hour long music video bender. Perfect Tuesday night, if you ask me.

Also, I have and love that food processor. I haven’t watched the DVD but I didn’t find it to be too difficult to operate – attach the blade, attach the top, slide and lock everything into place… maybe yours is defective?

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45 Vanessa August 31, 2011 at 5:44 pm

I read your blog often, but I don’t normally leave comments … not sure why. NEway … I just had to leave you a note because I LOVE the Target music teacher commercial. I say “Denim” now more than I ever did before!

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46 Rachel August 31, 2011 at 6:22 pm

Hmm. I don’t really agree with you saying The Hunger Games is like The Giver… Both dystopian, futuristic novels? Yes. Other than that similarity…. I don’t get it.

Something that’s bothering me, did you know that bananas as we know it are going to be extinct in 3-10 years?? How will I live without banana bread?! All because of a stupid fungus.

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47 Rachel August 31, 2011 at 6:37 pm

Actually that was via Amazon.com, either the review or description, which was why I finally decided to read it. I feel like the setting is similar and I just got similar feelings reading it…hard to explain!

And yeah that shit is bananas!

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48 Phoebe August 31, 2011 at 6:58 pm

I have a lot of different feelings about the “baby roulette” thing. (I unfortunately haven’t had a chance to read the article yet) I agree that it really sucks that women are cavalier about such an important decision. It also seems very unfair to their partners (if they have a partner) who should have an equal say in family planning.
However, if, just for argument’s sake, we only look at this in long-term, stable couples, it doesn’t seem quite so bad to me. After all, “baby roulette” is pretty much what people did for hundreds upon hundreds of years. I know society has advanced a lot and enjoyably so, but a lot of human behavior remains the same regardless of technology. I also have to admit that I have always kind of wanted to have kids younger than average so I am not totally impartial. My parents were quite old when they had me (they were actually on the Today show because of it! This was a long time before Madonna, Julia Roberts etc.) and while I had a fantastic upbringing and a great relationship with my parents, in consequence, I have always wanted to be much closer in age to my future children. Not that this exactly relates to “baby roulette” but I think there may be something to be gained at the same time something is lost. I also can’t help thinking that in our era of abortion, having a baby after an accidental pregnancy is a little more of a choice than it could initially seem like.

Speaking of young adult novels, the YA novel “Slam” by Nick Hornby is about teenage pregnancy, but from the guy’s perspective. It’s so good and, for YA skeptics, is barely a YA novel, as Nick Hornby writes mostly adult books and this is not so different in subtlety or whatever. I highly recommend it!

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49 Rachel August 31, 2011 at 7:37 pm

You know, that is a really good point about how this is a modern problem! But I feel like before BC was so widely available, both parties knew they were taking chances. It also wasn’t a chance they felt like they “had” to take because they were uncertain about career/motherhood/fertility. Great new perspective though — thanks!!

Checking out that book too!

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50 Kiki August 31, 2011 at 9:42 pm

I loved Hunger Games 1 and 2… fabulous… but I can’t help being SUPREMELY annoyed with Suzanne Collin’s character work on Katniss into book 3. Can’t she have a little perspective about… uh… anything??!! I get that teenagers are nearly obligated to think everything is their fault but I find her so irritatingly self-centered and self-absorbed despite essentially being the hero of the free world.

I won’t spoil anything, but I am so irritated. It’s like reading HP 5 if Harry was stuck in his emo phase… forever. Hope others enjoyed it better but ugh… I’m annoyed.

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51 Rachel August 31, 2011 at 10:00 pm

Yeah I didn’t like book 3 as much and her attitude definitely didn’t help! Total teenage brat phase.

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52 Lisa September 1, 2011 at 11:20 am

I hated the Twilight book so I assumed The Hunger Games was in that vein and I avoided it for a long time. I finally gave in and am so glad! The series is fantastic and I read each book back to back in a matter of days.

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53 Rachel September 1, 2011 at 11:22 am

Oh yeah, it’s so completely different from Twilight! Glad you gave it a chance!

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54 Janet September 9, 2011 at 11:55 am

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